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Anti-Paladin Filthy Slime Jam!

Pssst, hey kid. Do you revel in filth? Bathe in slime? Celebrate evil? Are you base?  Love yellow? Think Comic-Sans is fun and flirty? Then this, my friend, is the jam for you! 

A Farewell to Arms

“A record of Paladins’ dealings with the scum of the dying world and contains … the fullness of the everlasting virtue of uptight and haughty Paladins.”

A Question of Honor

“Get down in the muck, honorably. Roll in the slime, valiantly. Collect foreskins, to preserve your good name.”

Champion of Ruin

“Let yourself become the black disk to blot out the sun.”

Cloud of Sinners

“Submit your players to a purity test by forcing them to fight their inner demons.”

Cross of Glorious Victory of Filth

Concept: “A massive, prolapsed orifice fountains forth a constant stream of viscous contaminants. Drink deeply of its wickedness!”
Content:
The inverted anus cross we’ve all hoped for and dreamed of
Writing:
Light lore with mechanics for contact, consumption, and replication
Art/design:
Split-page layout provides easy access to the text and displays the cross in all its inverted anal glory
Usability:
“‘Nay, Theophrastus, cease to poke yon inverted anus cross!’”

D3 Items

Concept: “The crumpled body of a dead priest […] Lost in the struggle d3 trinkets lie scattered.”
Content:
3 holy items, two with mixed benefits and drawbacks and one with only bad consequences
Writing:
A paragraph for each, mixing mechanical with qualitative effects
Art/design:
All 3 items are illustrated in the central image; typographical variety in introductory text and item titles contributes to the visual texture and overall tone
Usability:
Clearly delineated blocks for each item; descriptive text is sans serif for easy reading

Death's Head at a Feast

Concept: “A new group of antagonists and a new ability for Mörk Borg player characters”
Content:
Includes a filthiness score mechanic, new sacred and unclean scrolls, and mechanics for rerolling failed tests (and additional effects for outcomes)
Writing:
Primarily devoted to mechanics but includes some introductory descriptive text
Art/design:
Text-heavy but stylized with blackletter (sometimes yellowletter) and some illustrations for macabre flavor
Usability:
Requires tracking an additional filthiness quantity, but the mechanics are simple

Glory Hole Mimic

Concept: “Regret incarnate”
Content:
No comment
Writing:
Standard stat block with special feature; dryly (but highly) comedic
Art/design:
Expressive, stylized title with readable text and an illustration just in case you’re not sure how it works; the pink obviously symbolizes true love
Usability:
Did no one ever warn you about putting things in places?

I am PalaDONE with your Sh*t!

“All displays of chivalric superiority and moral arrogance similarly inspire you to murder. Who the fuck do they think they are to judge you or anyone else in the dying world!?”

Kristian: Paladin

“A self-righteous, arrogant, murder hobo looking to cleanse the world and slay all who fall short of his unattainable ideals”

Lempo

“Once known as a playful spirit of love, bringing together the smitten and the starcrossed. Now feared as breaker of hearts, the fire that burns those impetuous enough to play with it.”

Lord of Flies

Concept: “We are hundreds, thousands and millions of flying insects that move your body.”
Content: A bug-based class
Writing:
Concise and straightforward without skimping on character
Art/design:
Relatively conservative with typefaces and visual elements, but features a great illustration
Usability:
Probably not for entomophobes

Mörky Waters

“In the depths of a seaside cave along the coast of Mûr dwells a horrific entity, a mess of eyes and teeth. A group of outlaws on the run hid in the cave where they encountered the beast and deemed it to be a god.”

Paladimwit and the Living Book of Goodness and Chivalric Truth

Paladimwit: “The ultimate and inevitable evolution of the Paladin”

The Living Book of Goodness and Chivalric Truth: “Rife with lore and absent of power, it is an object of great importance to many.”

Paladin Jam

Concept: “Some fools still believe in concepts like FAITH and MERCY and JUSTICE. … We ambush them, murder them, and squish them into delicious jellies.”
Content:
A faith-based spread
Writing:
Lore and a table of 6 effects based on the main ingredient’s faith
Art/design:
Typographical choices add emphasis and delineate sections; includes a picture if you’re curious what the jar looks like
Usability:
Goes great on toast (…made from the bones of the righteous)
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